How to Choose a Mediator

I have six recommendations for couples who are looking for a mediator.

  1. Ask about their training and if they are court-approved mediators.
  2. Ask about the number of meditations they’ve successfully completed.
  3. Interview more than one mediator and see who you feel is knowledgeable, keeps the playing field level and you feel comfortable talking to and is not judgmental.
  4. Look for a mediator that offers a flat fee for as many services as possible and a specific fee per hour for the time you are actually there in the office mediating. One of the big benefits of mediation is that it saves money so make sure your mediation cost is reasonable.
  5. Look for someone who specializes in divorce law so they can educate you about the law as it applies to your divorce. You don’t need a mediator who gives you directions but instead gives you information about your legal options.
  6. If you can find one, choose a mediator who has both a legal, therapy or child development background if your mediation involves children.


If I had to sum all this information up into one sentence, I would recommend that you check in with your gut during your first meeting with your mediator and ask yourself:

  • Does this person feel like a person who will be non-judgmental when you tell him or her what your goals and concerns are?
  • Does it feel like they genuinely want to help your family emerge from the divorce process as whole and healthy as possible?

Contact the Law Office of Marta J. Papa for a St. Louis divorce mediator with a straightforward, realistic, and organized approach to mediation.

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